My white whale

I’ve been wanting to do a blog post on some of my favorite creepy public art pieces for some time, but getting a picture of one of them has proved difficult. But today on my lunchtime run, I finally managed to get one. So without further ado, I bring you Pedophile Fountain!

The fountain streams are usually covering one of the figures, which is why it’s been hard to get a good picture in all of it’s creepy glory. But seriously, naked man staring at naked child in fountain form is just not okay. I’m sure there’s some fabulous hippie-artist explanation of man gazing on his inner-child or what-not, but give me a break…

Off to a good start

I spied this parked outside of a Starbucks (!) and had to take a picture. I’m not sure what’s more disturbing to me, that there’s a cup holder for the child or that it’s filled with a pretty large soda for a child small enough to ride in that thing. <shakes head sadly… >

Orange is the new black

I think I should just start a new blog for “ridiculous things spotted while on Target shopping trips with M.” I swear we see something hilarious every time we go. And today’s trip was a particularly good one. Apparently, it’s that “Decorate Your Dorm Room” time of year. Or, more accurately, “Buy Your College-Age Child Stuff to Embarass Them and Provide Their Roommates With Things to Make Fun of” season. So, without further ado, allow me to preview the hottest accessories coming to a freshman’s dormitory near you.

First hot trend, pillows shaped like food:

Note the attention to detail on the back:

And a detail of the lovely pizza pillow:

And the second hot trend for fall, plastic dishes that have textures of their intended foods:

(From top to right, we have Doritos, pizza slice, whole pizza, mac & cheese and spaghetti & meatballs.) Please also note that all the hot foods this fall are orange…

I am a little sad not to have a college-bound kid in my life to embarrass with these things, but writing snarky blog posts about them works too!

 

 

Hell in a handbasket…

I’m frequently horrified by television commercials for various pizza chains and the ridiculously caloric “specials” they frequently promote. (Like 5 pounds of pasta for five bucks. Shudder.) But that was nothing compared to what I recently saw in the freezer aisle of my local supermarket:

(I particularly like the spelling of “wyngz.” It also has a note that it doesn’t contain any wing meat.) T was on board:

But seriously, is there really a market for this? Was there really a consumer out there that was thinking “Hmmm, this pizza is good, but it would be GREAT if it came with some misspelled, non-wing meat containing, chicken wings?”

Another WTF post

It’s time for another entry in my favorite new category. And yet again, this one is brought to you by another shopping trip at Target with M. I don’t know what it is about the two of us in that store, but we always seem to see something hilarious every time we go there together. But before we get to that, allow me to share this lovely photo of yours truly that M shot on our way out the door:

Pretty good, right? It’s like she should do this for a living or something… And now, on to the main event:

The best part, aside from their disturbing appearance and kicky handbag, is that these lovely things were $20.00! WTF, indeed…

You gotta be kidding…

I love going to Target with M. Somehow, we always seem to find some product advertising a solution for something we didn’t know was a problem. Such as soap that gets rid of “kitchen hands.” Um, what? So, when Martha emerged around the corner with a dismayed expression, I wasted no time hurrying over to see what was up. Behold:

Black trashbags? How innovative. (eye roll.) What on earth is the point, dear advertisers? Why to hide the unsightly stains and spills from the INSIDE OF YOUR GARBAGE CAN! No, I’m not making that up:

If you seriously care what the inside of your garbage can looks like, you have problems. Problems far more extensive than a box of kitchen bags can solve. If I were a shrink, I’d just hang out in the garbage bag aisle of my local Target…